Duck Feet

So I found these yellow flats on sale for $3 at Rue 21 when I was in Flagstaff, AZ a few weeks back. I love them, I wear them like they're going out of style. I was at the mall in Eureka, CA and I found the same shoes, also on sale for $3. I bought them without hesitation. I might be going back for a third pair. These cheap yellow shoes are all I care about. I'm a woman obsessed.

A day late and a dollar short

More like 3 days late and 3 dollars short, but now I'm here to report on my Thanksgiving!

• The dinner table for 5 (My parents, my grandparents, and myself).

• The Turkey

• The jicama and mango salad that I made all by myself (recipe compliments of Sonny Anderson on Food Network).

Animals in and Around my House

Queeny

A large black woman in her past life. She was probably very good at making grits and most likely participated in a Baptist church choir.

Connie

Not my dog. Will sit there for hours without moving. Terrifying as shit. Was probably a bouncer or a fucking psycho in a past life.

Tommy

In a past life, this cat was definitely one of those white guys that enjoyed egg salad and scrubbed his toilet with a toothbrush religiously every day.

This is a picture of him mid sneeze.

Word of the Day

Bro

1. Friend; commonly used in greetings.

"What’s up bro?"
"I vouch for Todd, we've been bros since way back."

2. Traditionally white males who wear rugby shirts and baseball caps. They are most commonly found at college parties playing beerpong or holding red plastic cups waiting for chances to exclaim how "Awesome!" this party is or how "Wasted!" they are. Many "bro's" have spiked hair and frosted tips, and enjoy listening to Jack Johnson or Dave Matthews band while playing Xbox.

Related subjects:

Bro Hoe: A white girl who hangs out with "Bro's". These girls like to smoke weed, drink beer, be ignorant, and they DGAF (don't give a fuck.) Basically a bitch who thinks she's one of the guys because she rolls with his crew, but those guys only chill with her because she gives them head.

Bro Rape: When one bro rapes another bro. Internet Chat-rooms for bands like Dave Matthews, Jack Johnson, and Incubus have proven to be a hotbed for bro predators looking to pray on unsuspecting bros with phrases like "chill", or "dude let's just chill", or "hey bro, we're chillin'. Wanna get some beers and chill?"

Gazette

I always feel like I have so much I want to put in my blog, but when I actually sit down to write, I go... blank. So for now, a list:

1. I ate raviolis for breakfast.

2. I had a dream about me and two people I knew from high school (Andi and Janek), and we were trying to cook bacon, but we couldn't remember how to. We put some on a cookie sheet and put it in the oven, we put some in the microwave. We then found a copper baking pan that was covered in dried up something or other, and while we were trying to clean it my mother ran in and started screaming, "No! Don't use the copper! It's so hard to clean!" I have no idea what any of this means.

3. I am currently watching Rachel Ray. That woman uses her hands like crazy. Even when she's holding a bushel of parsley. She just said EVOO. I am content with life.

4. Two Words: Hedda Lettuce. This mother knows what she's doing. She also has a blog. "Mmm, yummy."Just go.

5. I cleaned my room. Event of the century.

6. I am obsessed with Mapquest. It amazes me that the internet can tell me exactly how long it will take, and how much it will cost to get to Baltimore Maryland from Arcata California. I waste the majority of my life planning fake road trips.

7. Paul Deen made a turduken. Strike me down Jesus. That woman is heaven sent, and very much like my grandmother... if my grandmother was Southern and crazy.

8. Later today, I will be coring a pineapple for the first time.

9. So I was looking for a picture of bacon to put in this post, and along the way I found one to many pictures of bacon bikinis. Google bacon, it's seriously the first result.

This is how I deal with the bums in Arcata

Still in my pajama's at 4pm and watching the European Music Awards

First, I'd like to thank Style Rookie once again for turning me onto Viktor & Rolf, without her I would have no clue as to where this dress came from.

So I was watching the '2009 MTV Europe Music Awards' and Katy Perry was hosting. She changed her outfit about 15 times, and at one point she sported this wonderfully bizarre dress by Viktor & Rolf:

Runway

Awards show- Katy Perry

Like Style Rookie, I wasn't incredibly fond of this collection, but this gown is truly glamorous and manages to successfully translate on and off the runway.

"What's wrong with you, you stupid Bitch?"

My current state of mind.

Music for the day

Hide and Seek- Imogen Heap

For Thomas

Obsesionado con cromo

I know. My title's in Spanish. I'm such an elitist pig. For the record I had to use an online translator to get that title. Dedication people, that's what it looks like.

So I've found another beautiful invention that you can download for free. Google Chrome. I downloaded it last night and I feel so incredibly chic I can't even stand it. When you download google chrome, it allows you to customize your browser with this huge list of layouts made by all these awesome people, ie: Vivienne Westwood, Oscar de la Renta, Pete Bjorn and John. The list goes on. So rad ass.

These are my favorites:

Todd Oldham

Charlotte Ronson

Ella Moss

So much fun. LOVE.

Epilepsy is Dancing

I was reading through the Charles Mee play 'Under Construction' just a few weeks ago when I came across a bit of stage direction that suggested the use of one of three different songs by Antony and the Johnsons. I had previously seen this play performed at the Galvin Playhouse in Phoenix Arizona. I couldn't remember this music for the life of me, so I researched the group. I now have a new love in my life: Antony Hegarty. His voice is not of this earth. I've included a couple of links to his music, please listen to at least one, they're entirely worth it.

Hope There's Someone
You are my Sister
Old Whore's Diet (w/ Rufus Wainwright)

Sweet Thuggin'

So I just got back from yet another trip to Flagstaff Arizona the night before last. I ended up spending far more time there than I expected to (which is, of course, a wonderful thing). I had a blast. I was able to see almost all of my friends. We had a get together at my friend Andi's apartment, we played 'Last Word', which I might add is the best game in the world, we watched Fight Club, we drank white wine, we went to In n' Out, we hung out at Denny's until 3 in the morning, we took midday naps. Best week ever.

To quote Cait "This dog was mean as shit", but luckily behind a car window.

My friend Cait bought this magazine for me because she is a beautiful human being (much like the man gracing this cover aka Wayne Coyne). LOVE.

The shin dig.Cait's grandma's house.
Jr and I= Straight up Gangsta thugs.And this weeks theme song was definetely a tie between:
Sweet Caroline- Neil Diamond

&

You and I- Ingrid Michaelson

Can't we all just love Lady Gaga?

Especially acoustic Lady Gaga? Please, indulge with me won't you?




and one more thing: Sugardaddy.com
Yes, finally a website that caters to girls that just want to screw for money.